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Hirap rin pala pag nawalan ka ng best friend. tssskkkk. LINSYAK! Nakakamiss :( Di lang naman ako ang bumitiw e, Pati siya kumalas na rin. Gusto ko rin namang ayusin a. Hindi ko lang alam kung papaano. Pero di nga, nakakamiss si van.

So. Yssa and I are dunzo, right? and she posts this thing on her damn blog.
okayyy. I have been keeping this all in for a while now, and she just blew it.

out of sight, out of mind.

I deleted her on my facebook, crossed her off my links section cause i only put my friends there, and bombarded myself with quotes to keep me from remembering what i cannot believe i did.

love your enemy. but don't forget [s]he is not your friend.
-Paulo Coelho


this is what happened. this is my side of the story. one day i was forced to believe that this friendship was over, and i wanted to know if she felt the same. and i can't ask her flat out, so i had to provoke her, and she tends to get emotional, so i can't say i wasn't shocked when she said she wanted out, that she didn't want her crazy buddy anymore, and i was happy that she realized what i knew all along, but i was NOT happy when she got hurt pretty bad. because i was hurt too, and the last person i wanted to walk out of my life was my best friend, so i begged. I begged her. I never beg. I have never begged anyone ever before. Not my dad, not my mom, nobody. God, yeah. but duh. anyway. she wanted out.

the other day i was in front of our school with tezza, ray, bai and rigel, waiting for rigel's dad to pick us up and take us to one of the probable locations of the movie-yes, rigel and i are not groupmates, but he is reallll good friends with ray, so anyway. i saw her pass on a tricycle, and i was so shocked to see her, i wasn't able to like snob her and stuff, but she did. so i thought she was still mad at me. she's mad at me. she hates me.

so last night she sends out this message that goes like, "you'll always be my bestfriend. :(" and i was like, OH NO YOU DIDN'T! liar liar pants on fire.

So is it gonna me who has to make the first move again? geez. di mo alam pano? talk to me. call me. message me. because srsly, I am sick and tired of having to chase you around, woman. Talk to me. Don't make stupid blog posts making you look like ikaw lang ang nawalan, because FYI, ako rin, okay?

But if you're not gonna make that move, then I'm sorry. GET OUT OF MY FUCKING LIFE. stop making me miserable, because i already am. It's so hard to forget, especially when you're being all cryptic.